Not thinking I know what’s good for the other person is the key to my job.

I’ve learned that the best solution for people simply comes from within. As the Indian philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti said, “It is far more important to ask the right question than to get the answer. The solution to a problem lies in understanding the problem; the answer is not outside the problem, it is within the problem.

And that is where the real problem or solution may lie. When people face challenges or seek advice, they sometimes don’t ask the right questions. They ask ‘how should I solve this problem’ when it may not even be clear what the problem is.

And that’s where I can help as a coach. My job is to ask the right questions, not to give the wrong answers in advance. It’s about uncovering what’s really going on, what the real problem is and what’s stopping my clients from solving it.

Asking the right questions makes all the difference and can lead to profound insights. And the key is to “coach the person, not the problem” (copied from Marcia Reynolds).

The next time someone comes to you with a problem or concern, consider this:

Resist the urge to give advice (no matter how well-intentioned), ignore your own belief that you know what’s good for the other person, and instead ask some questions that will help them see the core of the problem – then they will see the solution (this works just as well for business as for personal matters).

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